For swingers, finding a real partner who is aware and active in the adult sexy lifestyle can be difficult and even uncomfortable. You want to find someone who is as open-minded as you are and has no problem sharing their body with a virtual stranger. Unfortunately, the emotional maturity that comes with this aspect of the adult sexy lifestyle is not something people are ready for on a first date. On the other hand, staying in a known community can mean you’ll always meet the same faces, limiting your options for a long-term relationship. Sometimes, you want to expand your horizons and meet new people. Or you’ll find someone who surprises you and develops feelings you never expected. The stumbling block here is, what if this person was into the “adult sexy” lifestyle? Most people you meet don’t know what goes on in the swinger community because “adult sexy” is a more widely accepted and practiced lifestyle. You don’t understand the mindset and may even see the “adult sexy” lifestyle as another way of saying you’re cheating on your partner. In the rare case that you find a swinger who wants to date you, you need to determine if he’s emotionally and mentally okay with the lifestyle or if he expects you to go back to the “adult sexy” lifestyle change. The whole process can be stressful, but if you find someone who is worth it and willing to overcome your differences, the adult sexy will be one of the most vital relationships you’ve ever had.
Explain your needs
If you are dating someone for adult sex, it is just as important that the other person understands your views.
As long as you agree with everything that entails, one person can be a swinger while the other remains an adult. Unfortunately, this means that in the early stages of adult sex, you are making yourself completely vulnerable and exposing yourself to difficult discussions that may ultimately call things off if you cannot agree on what adult sex should be. The most important part of this early discussion is that, as a swinger, you need a certain level of fulfillment to be happy in a long-term sexual relationship. Whether this means that you need to bring other players into the bedroom to feel fulfilled or what your specific needs are, it is essential to clarify this at the beginning to avoid any heartache or resentment later.
Open Communication Channels
It’s also important to talk about communication. For example, if your partner is adult sexy but happy to maintain your lifestyle, how much do you want him to know about your outside relationships? Does he want to know in advance about everyone you have sex with, or does he want to know about the nights you go out? These boundaries can make or break your relationship, especially if your adult sexy partner is dating a swinger for the first time. It may take him a while to separate the emotional aspect of adult sexy from purely physical sex with no emotional connection with swingers. The boundaries are narrow and may be difficult initially, so be prepared for lots of communication from the start.
